Match.com and eHarmony both play on the same field, so to speak, so if you are thinking of signing up to an online site, how do you choose between them? Both are dating sites targeted towards a large audience of people in different demographics, with different interests. These are two of the pioneers in online dating, and the two of them take the matching of their beloved members very serious. Let’s take a look at eHarmony and Match to figure out why one is more suitable for you than the other.
eHarmony
eHarmony started in 2000 in the USA and opened up in the UK in 2008. The site is based on finding truly compatible matches for people to engage in long-term relationships. The site asks every user to fill in a very long, exceedingly detailed questionnaire. These questions are the result of over 35 years clinical psychology experience plus a further three years of research and development. Dr Neil Clark Warren worked with couples for almost four decades and became aware that extreme differences could cause irrevocable splits between couples over time, no matter how strong their initial bond was. He used his wealth of experience in conjunction with Dr Galen Buckwalter’s work to come up with the premise of the site and scientific formula that endeavours to create the best matches for successful long term relationships.
Given the scientific background of the site it is not too surprising that the website as a whole has an almost clinical appearance to it; a strong sense of calming therapy being not too far away to analyse your feelings and ‘diagnose your best connections’ almost! eHarmony is currently available in, as well as the USA and UK, Canada, Brazil and Australia, and they have plans to expand even further afield. A unique questionnaire is formulated for each new country of operation in order to ensure the best possible matches according to the culture and people that will be using the site.
Match.com
Match.com is the grand old person of the dating site world, having started way back in the infancy of the internet practically, in 1995. The site’s managers are certain that they are responsible for large numbers of marriages but are unable to provide statistics, as this was not a routine practice back then! With an avowed aim of taking the lottery out of love, Match.com works hard to find the perfect partner for you. They also offer the ‘Daily 6’; six new profiles that may be of interest, sent to your inbox each day.
The more you respond and interact with other people on the site, the more you are raising your profile, hopefully with the end result of you catching the eye of the one. Match.com also asks for a wealth of information as likes and dislikes but also encourages users to spice it up a little and look at people whose profiles are opposite to what they might typically like, just in case of a case of opposites attract being true.
The site is extremely packed with links to advice, articles, information, how-to sections,… and some rather nice-looking young people’s profiles too!
The Differences
The main difference between the two sites is that eHarmony only sends links to people which it believes are very good matches, a business-like solemn approach. Whereas Match.com encourages their users to mix it up a little and get to know a great range of people, to widen your social circle.
Which One Should You Go For?
That depends entirely on what you are looking for by joining a social site like eHarmony or Match.com. If you are looking for a long term relationship with someone suited to you literally on a scientific level, then choose eHarmony; but if you would like a wide range of friends to help you discover what it is that you are looking for in a relationship, then Match.com can help you broaden your horizons.
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FRANCIS i NICOLLE says
Over 100 emails sent out and not a single responce. Most profiles are fishing scams. Canceled my subscription and deactivated my account a MONTH ago yet they still just hit my bank for another $104 and refuse to refund my money since i did not save my confirmation number. When called they say my account is still active and visable and even though they charged me less then 24 hours ago im stuck having a paid membership for another 3 months. AVOID this site at all costs!
Andrew C says
Match.com I hadn’t even completed my profile was bombarded with emails why should you have to pay just to send a wink or to see their profile etc what a scam even on a different site was asked for money even reported to site they never replied I’m glad I didn’t subscribe to this site no dating sites are good and have little faith in such sites I won’t use a dating site ever again all out to get money but not the customer service I tried to get in contact with match.com via play store my message was rejected clearly not a good site their customer service is appalling don’t waste your time and money
Amber says
Seriously Match.com sucks, I have men messaging me and appearing to be somewhat of a match with what I want , one big problem with that is a lot of them do not fall into one or two categories that I chose as “must haves.” In the month I have had a Match profile I have not come across a single profile that I would be remotely into. Heck I actually have way better luck on Tinder than I ever did on Match.com. Further, TINDER at least got it right that it does not allow people to message eachother until both persons have swiped right, now you wont be annoyed by guys who definitely are not into like on Match. However, Match does have this feature except you have to pay for it as ANOTHER additional fee. ANother great feature of TINDER is that it is completely FREE unlike MATCH. Match was a complete waste of my money!!!!!!! So so so disappointed!!!!
Pdudgeon says
I’m seriously beginning to wonder if there are any real people on Match dot com, or whether the majority of the users are bots. And I agree, reporting the bots only removes the profile–not the person behind the bot.
So far I’ve gone 0 for 4; no real people and 4 bots. Don’t waste your money.
chris says
Online dating has created a society where people look for instant gratification, serial dating, one night stand. They are constantly on to the next chase, as there are so many profiles out there, people are not interested in and don’t take the time to know each other enough.
I met a woman who broke up after 3 dates, because she did not feel a strong romantic connection.. when I was still trying to figure out who she really is. It takes me at least 3,4 months in person meetings, to start developing a meaningful connection. I have to ensure first, that the person is really who she says she is in her profile. I don’t expect sparks within the first few dates, it takes me longer. I must say that I am looking for a serious relationship, not just a casual hook up. (I must add, we were both equal physically and education wise)
This is online dating…, where we cannot blindly rely on what they write in their profiles or in emails . It’s not like we already knew each other a long time before, and now exploring the possibility of being more than a friend or acquaintance. People hardly know each other and want to feel romantic sparks fly within the first 3 dates ?
I wish there was a site, where only people serious enough to invest into a real relationship, are allowed in.
Katt says
I agree to a degree… However, I really understand wanting that spark you get when you first meet someone. Like, if we were at a dance and you looked across the room at the precise time I do…and for the rest of the night we are connected…which leads to the rest of our lives. That’s the kind of romance that men now avoid and blame dating sites making the exact same argument…”I need to get to know them first”. Reality is… YOU KNOW after 30seconds if there is a connection… the rest you are either trying to make it happen or run from it. Ijs
Suzan says
I couldn’t agree more with Chris’ comment. I’m giving joining a sight much thought. I don’t look forward to weeding out those not looking for a serious relationship. May I ask which dating site(s) you chose?
Ralph Maclean says
I have read the other reviews and agree with them. These business models are all the same. You think that these sites are free, that’s what they tell you. You sign up, post your pictures, get your profile taken care of. Then most of the ladies are more than fifty miles away or more. I had one from another country. You receive winks, only to find out that you cannot respond, without joining the dating site and giving out your credit card number. It looks like these dating sites get you all excited, and then want your money. You don’t know if these people are shills, pretending to be potential mates, working for the dating site, and their objective is to get paying customers. One dating site does not mention that they have a extra sign-up fee for new members, in addition to what they advertise. And some members say that these companies still charge their card after your membership expires. Members have send registered letters, tried to call, sent e-mails, trying to get them to stop charging their cards. I think that these companies are in a position to play both parties. They are in a position to get both parties interested. But the bottom line is to get your credit card, and play both ends, and you end up out of money and finding somebody that you would like to meet.
AC says
I had a terrible experience with eHarmony. I’m writing this to protect you! Please read:
I tried to be a mature adult about it. This makes sense, right? From time to time in life you will buy something and realize it’s not what you wanted, so you’ll contact a business and see if you can work something out together.
I called so many times in my short 6 weeks stint that I saved the customer service number in my phone. Their Customer Service representatives treat you like you’re stupid. Even when they were nice, they have little ability to actually answer questions about the site.
These are the reasons I was dissatisfied:
1) I had an issue signing up, I couldn’t access my account because of an email issue.
2) I had technology problems with the website. The pages, photos and profile wouldn’t save. I would enter information 6-10 times.
3) The app didn’t work at first, my information didn’t transfer over and was completely blank for several hours.
4) I accidentally purchased a $24.99 add-on. There was no confirmation button and it took the money out of my account immediately (they did refund me).
5) I changed my match criteria countless times (when it would save) to improve my options or potential. Because my matches never replied to me. I posted several photos, asked others for input, filled out the profile fully, and took it seriously, but after 6 weeks I never matched with one person who I would actually date. Scientifically, it doesn’t make sense that I should send numerous “smiles” and never get a reply. I’m not everyone’s type, but I’m also not an Ogre.
6) My matches were too old, too young, not attractive to me, or had little to nothing in common with me. I was matched with 2 friends, one from childhood, another was a coworker. This told me their criteria for choosing matches is very shallow and unfounded.
7) When you call, their customer service has little to no real information to help you.
8) I asked for a refund and they sent me an email because they couldn’t help me or answer my questions. I had to write out and explain all of my frustrations again. There is no number to call and follow-up after that email.
9) They deactivated my account… I was a paying customer! But when I called to ask about it, the Customer Service person said he didn’t have the reason for why I would be kicked-off. 10) I finally sent another email and they would not tell me why they deactivated me or allow me to reactivate. I paid a set price believing I would have 3 months to use their product, but they cut me off halfway through with no explanation. When I called, they made me go through the email process again.
10) When they did finally reply to my email, they said I broke the Terms and Conditions, but would not elaborate. I literally have no idea why I was kicked off.
11) Even after they kicked me off halfway through my paid subscription, they still wont refund me.
12) eHarmony claims they are successful. But they refused to refund me after all of my frustrations and disappointments.
Here’s the bottom line. eHarmony will not give you realistic matches, they will allow you to pay and they have no problem taking your money and deactivating your account without giving you a dime or explanation.
Do not join eHarmony.
Read all the reviews, eHarmony is known for not cancelling subscriptions and taking renewal money when people called, emailed and clarified they wanted it cancelled.
Dawn says
I was on Match.com for 6 months and kept running into the same profiles, serial daters, and men wanting photos! Match.com is a site not worth spending your money on, and the men to me were just looking for 1 night stands and not wanting relationships even after their profile said they were! There are scammers and hackers on Match.com and when you report them nothing happens! Match.com turns its head because they are just interested in getting your money! So please save your money Match.com is not the place for anyone who respects themselves. We all need to go back and meet people the old fashion way! Be safe fellow daters, that special someone is out there just have patients!
C says
I met my wife of four years on match.com. Guess we didn’t “respect” ourselves. Nice lack of patients(sic) you have. Quick to over generalize. Hmm, maybe *that’s* why you’re still single?
Lynne says
out of 50 dates through POF you will probably find one friend (who is not interested in long term relationship) and a week-end lover. I just wished that internet dating would have been available in 1992 when I was 20…
Apparently we will have more rewarding relationship thanks through the internet options, however we may not commit as much as before…
Still think that only after 3-6 months of friendship one can decide who can become more than a friend. my e-mail [email protected]
Marcia Brown says
I am sooooo Glad I Googled “Complaints for Our Time” while considering it, because it led Me to Match and EHarmony complaints. I am w/Match and after 2 weeks I called to cancel my account. Was told it can’t cancel until my 3 months Payment is complete. It’s funny how they breakdown the costs monthly to appear it’s totally w/in Your Budget but the truth is, they know once a Customer realizes it’s no Magic Mirror, they would only have Customers committed for a Month. It’s also ironic how Customer Service is mainly online accept for Match who had Banker Hours…Lol. Same Your Money on ALL these Sites…. AND THANK YOU to Everyone for Sharing their Stories and Empowering the People. They cannot exist w/Out our Moolah. Power to the People!!!
tom m says
Eharmony is a rip-off. kept sending profiles over a month old, or the only match was the age range and location. some girls had not answered any questions, yet eharmony said we matched??? They did no better than Plenty of Fish (POF.com) yet wanted double or triple the money. Don’t waste your time and money. go on POF. you can search for “matches” for free, or get slightly more info as a paid subscriber. But getting dates is free, period. This review on this site seems slanted, as in eharmony must have been providing a benefit.
Ladonna says
I am a one man looking for a mature man between the age of 40 and 55 that is stable loving romantic spontaneous and loves to treat a woman like a princess
michelle forinas says
hi im michelle forinas im 43 single im find the man between 45 to 70 years old that is understanding loving and caring and honest
yngfrede says
If you are still looking check out my email [email protected] and try to talk or chat, im in the range your looking for 53 yrs….c ya
derik says
Would love to chat email me
derik says
Ooops forgot my email lol. Would love to chat michelle email me at [email protected]
tam says
I joined eharmony the middle of December, 2014, and found the love of my life one week later. The both of us knew what we wanted, being 51 and 56 years old, and knew we had a good thing in each other. YAY for eharmony!
T says
Thanks for giving some hope! Be blessed together.
Juliskamagyar says
Depends. I was on both and personally much, much prefer Match…but that is because I have decent communication skills and preferred a man with the same. Found my boyfriend.
Eharmony is good if you tend to be more passive or are not comfortable corresponding.
In general the quality of men on both is similar. I just found that Match had many more men my age (over 45) and I could search using the tools. However, birth have way better quality of men than okcupid or pof.
Neither is all that expensive in the scheme of things. Do not subscribe for more than a month!! Especially Eharmony or they will run out of guys and will send matches from hundreds of miles away
Tom says
I haven’t tried eharmony but decided to take the chance and pay for a match membership. NOT WORTH IT. Non-paying members cannot respond when you email them, so just go ahead and forget about a good percentage of anyone you actually see on there. The worst part is that match is infested with scammers. You know, the profiles that have only one pic and it is a beautiful pic, with a description that is written in engrish, “Yes I am young and pretty though I seek for middle aged man of experienced and fun time”. The scammers will send you winks and messages and likes from all over the country. The site is garbage. Much worse than the two big free dating sites.
Heather says
I met my ex-husband on eharmony. When we both went back on eharmony we were matched again. I read his profile and I thought “Boy , we had so much in common.” I read further and thought “This is UNCANNY! We are SO much alike…but wait..” then I realized he had read my profile, liked it, and copied and pasted it instead of writing his own. Funny and true . I also saw guys from the 5 years ago still on or back on again just like me…. not worth the money , oh and the same people are on Match too.
Natalie says
I was a member of both eharmony and match..both were a total waste of my money and time..
eHarmony kept sending me guys from 200+ miles away, or had several of my deal-breakers…..and the very few that were remotley interesting to me didn’t even have the courtesy to respond back..
Match.com…yhe only messages I recieved there wewre from fakes/ foreign guys “I saw your profile and it made my blood jump I will like to know you better”…
You wouldn’t think such creeps would be on a a *paid* dating site, but..yeah they were…
I tried Our Time….saw few men that were my “type”…(filling out a profile or having information on your intetrests is KEY for me, if your profile is empty or mostly blank I am not interested..)
They few I replied to again…like eharmony, didn’t have the courtesy to reply back…
I stick with POF, OkCupid, DateHookup…they are free sites.
I don’t have to pay for the privelege of being ignored there..
One comment to “Mark on May 24, 2014”:
A lot of us ladies are still on there because of the useless profiles on there..
We get the fakes, the foreign guys..the guys with no class wanting naked pictures..the ones who can’t write a decent sentence/ can’t spell/ darn near illiterate…
Oh…and I wish someone would come up with a site for all those Harley guys to go to to meet women into them…
I have to go through every week and block/ hide the profiles that mention them..seems it’s the new middle-aged crisis toy… 🙁
rio says
Very true. I fully agree with you. Hope you have met your “TYPE” by now.lollLLLZZ
Natalie says
I was a member of both eharmony and match..both were a total waste of my money and time..
eHarmony kept sending me guys from 200+ miles away, or had several of my deal-breakers…..and the very few that were remotley intersting to me didn’t even have the courtesy to respond back..
Match.com…yhe only messages I recieved there wewre from fakes/ foreign guys “I saw you profile and it made my blood jump I will like to know you better”…
You wouldn’t think such creeps would be on a a *paid* dating site, but..yeah they were…
I tried Our Time….saw few men that were my “type”…(filling out a profile or having information on your intetrests is KEY for me, if your profile is empty or mostly blank I am not interested..)
They few I replied to again…like eharmony, didn’t have the courtesy to reply back…
I stick with POF, OkCupid, DateHookup…they are free sites.
I don’t have to pay for the privelege of being ignored there..
One comment to “Mark on May 24, 2014”:
A lot of us ladies are still on there because of the useless profiles on there..
We get the fakes, the foreign guys..the guys with no class wanting naked pictures..the ones who can’t write a decent sentence/ can’t spell/ darn near illiterate…
Oh…and I wish someone would come up with a site for all those Harley guys to go to to meet women into them…
I have to go through every week and block/ hide the profiles that mention them..seems it’s the new middle-aged crisis toy… 😛
J Mann says
I have to laugh at eharmony for the philosophy that finding someone with the same values, interests, hobbies, etc. is a good thing (Which, by the way is the same kind of thinking the advertisers are subjecting us to with personalized ads… You’ll never see anything new, because they attempt to keep yo in your experience rut).. I digress. If two people in a relationship were the same, one would not be needed – Author Unknown
Dan says
I met my husband in 2010 through eHarmony. I lived in Mexico and he lived in the U.S. A lot of questions to answer to create your profile but it is worth it. I decided to do online dating specificly because I didn’t want to deal with guys I was not interested in. Match.com was all over the place and I couldn’t control or avoid certain profiles I was not interested in. EHarmony was like a mirror, I met guys that had the deep important things I was looking for and on the outside they were all different in race, social and economical backgrounds. So it was not like you only get “one type of people”.
I’d say it is slow, you have to be patient and it is not magic. I had to adjust some filters after the first profiles I got were very specific. Then I met architects, lawyers, and many guys from very different professions. I got my husband’s profile and thought he seemed nice. We started to do the guided conversations and then exchanged emails. Wrote each other once a week for 2 months and then started Gmail chat. After that, we video chat and then I traveled to the US to meet him 3 months after recieving eHarmony’s profile.
How was it? Weird at the beginning. We were kind of in love already and meeting phisicly is a totally different thing. And I am not saying we were not attracted to each other, it had just to be buit with some time together.
We both got what we expected.
We’ve been married for over two years and going stronger.
My opinion is that eHarmony requires more time at the beginning but after that you get what you pay for, on Match you might not need to make much effort but it is an ocean of people and it is like finding a needle in the hay in there. It seems more fun but you end up losing more time eliminating undesired people. But hey, I bet you can met the love of your life in any of them. Just give it a shot, it is worth it!
Jesse says
Do you live near Guadalajara?
Mark says
Date sites are becoming mainstream not because of the benefits they had given to their subscribers. The caveat is … the only benefit the subscribers are getting is serial dating. Date sites, regardless of scientific approach or latest and newest algorithm platform, are just that date sites. Subscribers that sign up are more of the players (just in here to get sex but still committed to someone), predators (go to sites, find someone and have casual sex, dumped the person, and go back to the sites for the next victim), and the mental / criminal violators (ex-convicts and mental disorder people…they use the sites to get victims). The great people can still be found on your organizations, work places, churches, charity organizations, fitness camp family, and the most reliable of all is through common friends.
I’ve subscribed to Match, eHarmony, POF, OKCupid, Tinder, and Badoo to observe these sites. All the women you find in one sites will surely be in one of the others, if not all. The choices are just repeating over and over. With my location, the city is not as big as the others, when I left last year and re-join Match and eHarmony after a year, same group of ladies are in there and maybe 1 to 3 people are new. In a year’s time, these pretty ladies are still in there? There is something wrong. I believe scientific approach (by eHarmony) and algorithm (Match) are only useful in matching profiles but beyond profiles…how the couple handles stress in the relationship is the deal breaker that’s why these individuals hang around on the site much longer. Profiles can’t provide calculation on how one person can handle the drama within the relationship.
Recommendation: Stay away from online date sites and save your monies. Go back to old reliable way of meeting people. Be sociable again!!!
Marie says
As a women who as dabbled with online dating every now and then, mostly then, I completely agree with your accurate review and suggestions.
Eve says
Mark has expressed thoughts but better than I could right now, anyway. I tried Match a few years ago then realized it was just a hook-up site and then E-Harmony but gave up on it pretty quickly too – as he said, you see the same old faces over and over and end up getting discouraged and want to give up. I WISH I could meet men the old fashioned way – that’s how I’ve made it through 50 plus years, but all my friends are married and I’m definitely not going to be a bar fly.
Just ended a relationship that lasted a year – met because he was a client of mine. Thought I had met the love of my life, but he wanted nothing to do with commitment. That is the only reason I’m considering
E-Harmony – supposedly the guys on that site want that – LOL…..
emily says
Dont need to join in both match and eharmony. You will not have control about who you want to meet with in eharmony. They think they are God and chose someone for you . You even dont have an access to search. Their best policy is not to give lots of choices to their member and teach the member to chose from their selection. The nrw member will know that eharmony only offer few basic function on their site, profile, new match, communicate. Thats all.
So dont beliece their rating.
On other hand. You can control who you want to meet in match. But because of their are so many availabilities, most people are lokking for serial dates.
Funny thing is you will find 90% of members have both accounts. So if you want to 10%, you can waste your money by joining into both site. Also you will find most members from other gree site as well.